going to mpls to pick ellyn up at the airport then we shall hit ikea!!!!!!!!!

tomorrow either late morning or early afternoon i shall load all the kids (and dog) into the car and head to Ishpeming.

thanksgiving: at my sister's cooking, eating, drinking, playing rock band, etc.

friday: lunch w/ some old high school pals, parade, ?

saturday: ?

sunday: head home

would like to get together with people if possible. but i know everybody else has a crazy schedule as well.

to give you a laugh. here is what my grandparents in law wrote in their last email to me:

"Teresa i would not let jay be alone to much when he works as i have seen to many nurses
and other women grab a doctor when he is alone and they put the temptation up to him i think that was partly robins trouble
it is nice when he does get home to have you there"

merely cut and pasted that.....

well, it had to happen. harry has become a teenager. most interactions with him involve some am't of surliness. he his irritated by our mere presence and any attempt at interaction is met with an attitude of "why are you bothering me". oh boy how i love the teenage years. good times, my friends, good times. but you all shall find out in time. it is something you cannot really communicate to people it is something that has to be experienced to be understood. we got his first report card and he is doing very well at school so at least we have that comfort--he is not rebelling by giving school the big finger.

jay has had this week off. it is always hard to adjust to. when he works he works about 100-110 hours a week and then when he is off he is here all the time. i am used to running my own ship and doing things my way. because he works three weeks on and two off it is not like we can take a vacation everytime so he just gets to hang around the house. he then decides he is going to make this ship run his way. we bicker a lot. we will need to find someway to make these vacations less stressful.

ellyn's preparations for ghana are going in high gear. we have had to pay several deposits and she has had to have 3 shots and get two more. we have to order her plane ticket--how much is a plane ticket to and from ghana--a cool $1,400--which we have to buy now because she can't get her visa unless she has the ticket. she has to get malaria medicine which she takes the whole time she is there and for a month after coming back. she is not yet set on housing there--she will either be in the dorms or in a house with a family.

on other depressing money news. we have going back and forth with our realtor in lansing. nothing in our area has sold for over $60,000 in the last 8 months. Lansing has one of the worst markets in the country. that would be all well and good if we didn't owe $74K on our lansing house. So we are going to take a bath on this--if and when we sell it. it pains me just to think about it. physical pain.

to counter my bitching with some positive stuff:

1. went and bought a fifth of bombay sapphire gin. i just gaze at the bottle in all its loveliness.

2. knitting a sweater for una. i like knitting.

3. got the new julian casablancas cd. he was/is the lead singer of the strokes. i am loving it.

4. we might go to minneapolis later today. stay in a hotel tonight and go out and about tomorrow. NO mall of america!

it will be ellyn's 20th b-day on the 12th.

i want to buy her a good book.

i tend to run to the classic, must read for book gifts for her.

do you all have any suggestions?

thanks

kinda having a hard work week. the thing about being a stay at home mom is that if you have a bad day and work is driving you crazy and you are complaining there seems to be this undeclared question from others, "why do you stay at home if it sucks?"

it doesn't suck all the time. it is not hard all the time. but it does suck every once and awhile and it is very often hard.

the hours are long, your underlings can be insubordinate and demanding, etc.

also, being a stay at home parent isn't really all that respected. but you do often get that "well, isn't that nice" when you say you stay at home. I am old enough now that people have stopped asking what i am going to do after this. yep, this whole stay at home thing is my real life not a 2 or 5 year diversion from my real life. Una will be 21 when i am 60. she won't be finished with college until i'm 62 or 63 and qualifying for social security!

i have noticed a big difference since Ellyn was little-whether the change is society or me i don't know. I think with Ellyn I was just getting my footing on this whole parenting thing and i was still trying to get my footing on the whole being an adult thing so i was apt to be more of a "good enough" mother. But also there does seem to be more pressure now on parents. I don't think the whole hovering thing is coming only from the parents. I think there is a more society-wide feeling that you should be involved in every aspect of your child's life. i feel like i am negotiating that all the time. I cannot really be involved at either harry's school or f/c's school coz of una. F/c's school wants a parent helper in the class EVERYDAY. IN THE CLASS. how can you not feel like a slacker when you get the calendar for the upcoming month and there is a mother (coz it is always a mother) listed for almost everyday and you have never done it????

last weekend my sister and her family came over and we went to the local waterpark. the kids all had a good time and the waterpark looks like something we will visit again during the winter.

harry was supposed to fly out this morning for new orleans to visit ellyn and go to the Voodoo Fest but last night the airline called and cancelled his flight because of some storm. They said he could still fly out of Minneapolis--so i could drive him 3 hours to the airport so he can fly out....no. so he is flying out tomorrow at the same time and should get to New Orleans in the mid-afternoon. The opening act isn't until 9pm anyway. i should have demanded some cash off the ticket for my inconvenience. i wish i was more of a bitch.

we have done some decorating around here but with harry gone and jay working on halloween there will be no one here to hand out candy because i will have to take the twins out trick or treating! they bought mario and luigi outfits which they have been wearing off and on all week. we watched ghostbusters this weekend and carter became convinced he wanted to be a ghostbuster and was trying to come up w/ all kinds of ideas of how to make a ghostbuster outfit.

for me it has been about little things. i made two new things for dinner and both turned out well and were liked by everyone (except for finn and carter but they hate everything)--black bean tortilla pie and pork chops and apples with both cooked in Hennessey! i might cook just apples in hennessey today. yum.

i went and got some fall clothes at old navy but unfortunately my new look is inspired by che guevara--cargo pants, black boots and black top. i am ready for suburban guerilla warfare!

jay flies to dc tomorrow to take his oral boards. a lesson learned to pass on for the sake of others: don't wait until less than a week before your trip to buy your ticket. he will be back monday and whether he passes or fails will feel more relaxed and less like there is an ax over his head.

i am knitting some for winter stuffs. i have been checking out what marc jacobs has out this season in term of scarves and hats and thinking of making my own instead of paying the $150 or so they are charging--not that i would be paying $150 for a scarf or a hat. a lot of the designs are very basic--easy enough for a novice knitter to do and they charge $$$$ for them. some are made of good yarn--but yarn is not that expensive!

finn and carter are very excited for halloween. we went and got some decorations and it upped the excitement level. i got a big bat for the front porch and a thing that lights up for the front yard. we attempted to go to the boo in the zoo here but i ended up parking about 6 blocks from the zoo and we were in line for nearly 30 minutes and would have had at least 20 more when i talked the twins into maybe trying again tomorrow. finn wasn't dressed that warmly so they were easily convinced.

sick of cooking so we are going out to eat. it is almost as much work to figure out where to go that we can all sort of agree on. there are a couple of places around here we still mean to check out--the thirsty pagan (a micro brewery pizza place) and gonk's (a burger place). both are in superior.

We had a good time visiting and being visited during Jay's vacation.

For the first weekend we went up to the UP and Jay and Harry went and saw Zombieland with the Olson's. After the movie we shared some fine conversations and fine lubricants. We got to share some Cabo Wabo and I got to spend some time with E. while the folks were at the multiplex. (no, i did not share any wabo with E. though, she came with her own cans of orange crush!)

The weekend after the Seppanen Clan came out to our place. We enjoyed a meal on Friday at grandma's and they got some big city shopping in at the mall. On Saturday we all went to Pizza Luce and watched some movies. Our house is almost big enough to allow 5 kids run around without it being too loud.

This week I have P/T conferences at harry's school. 5 minute conferences with each teacher. 5 minutes? WTF? The kids are all off Friday and I am hoping to drag them all out to see Spike Jonze's Where The Wild Things Are. Tonight, if you have HBO, is Jonze's documentary on Maurice Sendak. Sendak is a very interesting character--go read his wikipedia if you don't know any more about him other than he wrote Where The Wild Things Are. Also, check out Spike's We Love You So website. Wonderful beautiful.

Found out Wilco is going to be here in February. As a member of their mailing list i got to buy tickets during the presale and got row H bitches! 8th row. This will be my 6th time seeing them. (7th if you count my seeing tweedy acoustically and alone.) I must admit i didn't like the album before the last one but Wilco the album is growing on me. plus, Nels Cline is GOD.

Bought Harry's ticket to New Orleans. He is going down on the 29th and will go visit his sister and go to VooDoo Fest on the 30/31/1 and he will fly back home on the 2nd. I am not going to DC because Jay only really has to be there one day so he will fly out on Sunday and probably come back on Monday.

this is the second calorimetry i have knit. both are for my niece izzy and hopefully being sent out in the mail today. it is a wide headband that covers the ears--for iceskating, walking, running, skiing, etc., when it starts getting colder. fun and easy to knit. i am thinking of making a couple for the school auction.



(this yarn is pink camoflauge.)

1. i have gotten better w/ dealing w/ jay's schedule but his working 21 days straight and 100-120 hours a week is rough. For all of us it is about hankering down and trying to just power through until we reach the two weeks off. It is like crawling through the desert but seeing the promised land in the distance. 7 more days left! Since the kids are in school we will just try to go somewhere one weekend--Minneapolis or the UP.

2. Washington DC
Jay has to take his oral surgery boards Oct 19-21 in DC. (when you graduate from residency you are a surgeon and can get licensed but to be 'board certified' you have to take a day long ACT like test and then take a two day oral test where you go in a room with a table full of surgeons throwing questions at you.) I am contemplating going with him since i have never been to DC and i could spend two days exploring-with Una in tow of course. I would have my parents come down and watch the other three. Maybe I should try to set up a visit to my senator's office? Senator Franken!

3. I have recently been watching more movies than i have in awhile. I highly recommend Adventureland. I also watched Che, pt. 1 with benecio del toro as che. The kids and I watched Adam Sandler's Bedtime Stories and I thought it was good--better than I thought. I also watched Cadillac Records and I love Jeffrey Wright so i thought he was great as always but Mos Def was wonderful as Chuck Berry.

taking a break from knitting a hat for my niece. it is my second attempt. i made a hat and it was waaaay to small. this one i have ripped back two times already coz it was going to go above the ears if i didn't. i should be a more technical knitter and actually make a swatch and measure stuff but i am just a sort of jump right in knitter. I need to get the best book for knitting--Knitters' Handy Book of Patterns--that allows you to figure out how to knit hats, socks, etc. in different sizes and gauges. It would take the guess work out of knitting.

Took the twins shoe shopping on Monday. Their first year in preschool they were going through a costume period and I would let them go to school in costume. It was a bit more sporadic the second year. This year I went and got 'big kid school clothes' and they have actually been wearing them. Luckily they won't wear sweatpants anyway and they demand that their pants have many pockets so I went and about 8 pairs of different styles of cargo pants. As for shoes they demanded sketchers. why? i don't know. I am sure from commercials. we found them at jcpenney and they even light up. they are very proud of their shoes. They actually look respectable. As for acting i don't know--no notes home yet ; )

Harry will be home at about 10pm tonight. I am excited to hear how it went. I am hoping he had fun and it wasn't just painful. I am flying him down to New Orleans for Voodoo Fest this year. I have to buy the tickets. It is a big music festival in New Orleans right around Halloween (oct 30/31/nov 1) . this year eminem, silversun pickups, KISS, Jane's Addiction, WEEN, Gogol Bordello, Jello Biafra, George Clinton and Parliament, Flaming Lips, Squirrel Nut Zippers, and many others are playing. WTF am i not going????? ok looking at that list i have almost talked myself into going...........

I am thinking of coming over to the UP not this upcoming weekend but the weekend after that. Jay is on-call Saturday so he will be working all weekend.

I just want to remind people that Duluth has an indoor waterpark hotel and the rates went down as of september 1st. My sister and family is coming down on the 24th and the hotel has halloween stuff going on.

Good finds at the thrift store yesterday--two Star Wars animated Classics, Droids and Ewoks!

I think part of feeling comfortable in a place is having routines. well, we went to pizza luce last night and found out tuesday is spaghetti night. Big plate of spaghetti with 4 meatballs and two pieces of garlic bread for $4.99. The kids' meals are $3.25 for a big slice of pizza, a drink and a small bowl of ice cream. I think this will be our Tuesday night thing. After we ate we went to canal park and watched a big oar boat come in under the canal bridge--those things can move!

we have been in duluth nearly three months. neither the boy or i have friends--the twins have each other. the boy is much like me--very introverted and anti-social.

there was a mixer for spouses of physicians this upcoming monday but it starts off with a tour of his work--why do i want to tour my husband's work? maybe i am being too judgmental and maybe i would meet many people i would click with. "hey, your husband's a doctor. mine too. wow."

meredith told me i need to let my freak flag fly a little more so that other freaks can recognize a fellow freak. she said maybe some more visible tattoos and bumper stickers for my car.

i was contemplating taking a knitting class. i am going to take a women weights class at the Y when Una gets old enough to use the daycare there. maybe i should even contemplate taking a class at UM-Duluth.

Luckily Harry's school is having a camping trip this sunday-wednesday for all freshmen. they are going camping and portaging in the boundary waters. i am hoping harry is able to find one fellow freak. I think he would get along with all my male friends over here in livejournal--reads the same books, plays the same games,etc. so maybe i need to find him some 40 year old buddies.....

any advice

jay started back to work on labor day. so three more weeks and than another two off. the big vacation was a little too much driving and with the kids back in school we are thinking of renting a cabin for a long weekend somewhere and just relaxing for a bit.

we got harry enrolled and he started school. He is also going on his first school trip on sunday. the freshmen class is going camping in the boundary waters sunday-wednesday. they will spend one night in a cabin and the other two on the trail and will learn paddling and portaging. I think it will also be a great way for him to make some new friends at his new school.

finn and carter start Kindergarten tomorrow. from 4-5:30 today they have a hot dog roast/open house at their school so we get to meet their teacher and tour their school.

una is a little over a month old now. she still sleeps a lot and if she isn't sleeping she generally wants to be held. we just got a swing so we are hoping she will take to that. but yet i feel guilty if i am not holding her the whole time when she is awake--i feel that i should be enriching her every moment--making sure she gets enough face time and verbal enrichment. i don't know where this guilt comes from.

i am actually happy to be back on an earlier schedule. i feel like i get a lot more done and that there is more time to do stuff. i have been going to sleep at about 10:30 though.

we are back from our road trip to the badlands/black hills of South Dakota. It was a little too much driving in that it was 10 hours to the badlands and another couple to the Black Hills. We saw the Corn Palace in Mitchell, Wall Drug, Reptile Gardens, a chuckwagon/cowboy music show, Mt rushmore, and Wind Cave. We stayed a night in a cabin in Custer State Park and in the park fed burros from our car and saw many, many, many wild buffalo and prairie dogs. We decided Crazy Horse was something we could miss.

Since we have been back we have been trying to solidify school plans. It turns out that the twins can only do half day as the full day kindergarten classes are full. They will go the big 2 hours and 45 minutes from 8 am until 10:45am. And they will be in the same class. We have mixed feelings about this but we will see how it goes--they went to preschool together.

We are still undecided about Harry. Today Harry is visiting Marshall Academy....under duress. Their school year already started so Harry is shadowing a student through his school day.
It is a private school but it isn't the uniform kind. It is actually pretty laid back. The average class sizes are around 17 as opposed to the about 35 at East High School. We are pushing it but so far Harry hasn't been too hip to it. We are hoping the visit makes it seem like a possibility. 98% of their graduates go on to four year colleges and the other 2% go on to junior league hockey(this is minnesota after all). The average ACT is 26. So far none of these stats have convinced harry--why????

We stopped at IKEA on the way back home from our road trip. We now have ellyn's room with a single bed, another room with the full size futon and a blow up double mattress for visitors! if you feel like a small road trip feel free to use our home as a base --stay at our house to check out duluth or to go to the mall of america from!

Have to do back to school shopping for all the kids. I was also thinking of exploring Superior, WI because we haven't done that at all.

Una Beatrix Shoaps was born on August 2nd at 8:19 am after a little more than three hours of total labor. She weighed in at a tiny 6 lbs. and 3 ounces even though she was over 40 weeks.

Today she had her two week app't and weighed in at 7 lbs. and 8 ounces. She has a pleasant personality and wakes up to eat during the night but not a big cryer or fusser.

Yesterday was my 39th birthday. Jay and I (and Una) went out to eat in Canal Park. Jay also got my Wii Fit and Martha Stewart Cooking School book and some cd's by John Coltrane, Miles Davis and Fats Waller.

Ellyn left today to drive back to school but she is making many stops--first, Ishpeming, second, Mackinaw Island and third, East Lansing.

I ordered her textbooks for this fall and didn't end up getting three but spent: $550. Ouch. Money in, Money out.

Jay is in the last week of his three weeks on and will start his two weeks off next monday. We are back to thinking about a roadtrip. We have reduced our expectations and are thinking of just hitting South Dakota and hitting the Black Hills and doing Mt Rushmore, Deadwood, Crazy Horse.

on tuesday saw dr. Explained husband goes back to work on Monday and as she works at the hospital knows that docs can't really take sick days/vacation days/ etc. She says we could do an elective induction so that i could have some support and to make sure Jay could be there. She says to call the birthing center on wednesday morning at 6am and talk to charge nurse.

wed: call 6am. charge nurse says they are swamped and to call back at noon and see what is going on.
call at noon--they are swamped. tell us to call back at 5pm
5pm: yeppers, people still having babies call back tomorrow at 5am and they are hoping to have me in by 6am.

thursday: call at 5am and they say call back at 8am and we do so and things are still too busy. call back at noon. call at noon and they say it is going to be way to busy and we should call our doc and make other plans.

friday: i call the ob office. my doc is on vacation. they said they will have a nurse call me back. nurse calls me back about an hour later. she has called the birthing center again. the birthing center has told me they will call me back and they don't think they will be able to fit me in today but maybe this weekend. i tell her I don't think this is likely, should i make a doctor app't since i don't have one for the upcoming week?? she asks, well, do you want to? I ask her, what does she think? she says, i guess. So she makes an app't for me to see the nurse practictioner on Monday. The birthing center calls me back in the early afternoon and they said they are way to busy today and this weekend won't be good either. I tell them well i have an app't on monday and the charge nurse says, "well, she what she can pull out of her hat." feeling some antagonism between the docs and the birthing place nurses.

what a giant pain in my ass. this all would have been so much better if on tuesday the doctor would have just said, "we don't do elective inductions." it was not like i demanded it. i explained our situation and she offered it.

GIANT BULLSHIT SHOW.

now i just hate everyone at the birthing center. we are talking about when i finally go into labor if all my family is still here we bring EVERYONE in.

the stripping of membranes didn't seem to have any effect. I have been having irregular contractions on and off for about a week and yesterday i didn't have any more or any stronger ones after the stripping.

the doctor who set up the induction for today said to call the birthing center at 6am to see if they are busy. they do inductions like a triage. I am at the bottom of the list because I am a social induction. I called this morning and they were busy so they said to call back at noon. I was able to sleep a bit more but i am restless and somewhat anxiety ridden. my husband is of course able to sleep and is still in bed. At noon they still might say to wait.

got my membranes stripped today and set up for an 'social induction' tomorrow.

we got the day to put things in order.

all is good.

We are creeping closer and closer to the "due date": July 30th.

Yesterday I was very irritable and the refusal of Una to give up her home of the last 9 months is driving me insane. Tomorrow I have another ob app't at 1:30. I don't know if she will actually do anything that might speed things up such as strip my membranes. (Doesn't that sound comfortable?) I have been reading up and for some it pushes them into labor within 24-48 hours and for some it does squat. I think we will have to talk induction because Jay goes back to work Monday and Ellyn has to leave early Friday morning at the latest to work. She was going to leave on Wednesday to hang out with the Hill family but since Una is here she is willing to hang out a bit more. I am also not liking the idea of the kid just hanging in there putting on weight.

still pregnant.

it is starting to bring me down. i am starting to feel like i will always be pregnant as if this is now my natural way of being in the world. i will always be 39 weeks pregnant lugging a big baby around. not able to drink a beer, go in a sauna, eat some sushi, ride a bike.....it is like being disabled.

everyday i try to go about my day while trying to fit a lot of walking in (walking is supposed to make labor come quicker). Yesterday we went to Gooseberry Falls State Park and walked around--up hills, stairs, etc.--for a good two hours. Nothing.

I do have irregular contractions on and off all day but they don't get stronger and they don't get regular. (i am having one now as i write.)

At night I lay down and think maybe i will wake up to my water breaking. I wake up in the morning with my water all safe and sound in my uterus.

i am starting to think that Una will be like jay--who self describes himself as someone whom is never in a hurry.

I was thinking i should go and jump in Lake Superior and shock her out but then i was thinking that it might have the opposite effect--Una thinking, "good christ almighty what is that? I am staying in here."

Well today i am 39 weeks. Tonight my father-in-law, mil, and two sister-in-law's will be arriving in town for a visit. Tomorrow is the twins' b-day. I think we should mix in labor and delivery within this next two days to really up the stress level coz that is how i roll.

This morning i lost my mucus plug. I have been having irregular contractions for about the past week which has helped put me at about 3cm dilated. Last night they woke me up because they were a little stronger.

We haven't got the twins any b-day presents yet so we are going out this afternoon.